The Call of the Priestess Path

I remember when I first felt the calling to walk the priestess path.

I was about 12 years old. I had just discovered wicca and was eagerly devouring everything my local chain bookstore had not eh subject, when I came across the word Priestess.

To be fair, I didn’t really know what it meant, but it captured my imagination.

Priestess. Yes, that’s it. That’s what I want to be.

I had fantasies of running a coven, of organising events, of taking my group out under the stars to dance and pray to the moon…

venusian priestess pathOver the next decade or so, I fell deeper and deeper into the devotional aspects of paganism. I loved it whenever witch books would talk about moon rituals, daily practice, and honouring the Goddess. I ended up researching and falling in love with Goddess Spirituality.

And always, the call of the Priestess Path was strong.

Although a lot of the time, I still didn’t really know what it meant to be a priestess – or why I, the artsy atheist kid with zero religious upbringing, felt this call so strongly. Did it mean I had to join and run a coven? How could I become a priestess without one? What does a priestess do other than moon rituals?…

… and by that time, other thoughts had started creeping in, other sneaky, seductive thoughts like:

You know, I’m not sure I deserve to be a priestess.

I’m not devoted/calm/good enough for this.

Who am I to claim the title Priestess?

You know when you are a kid you don’t have any doubts about anything and you only see possibilities, not problems? You’re all, YES I am going to be a vet AND an astronaut, I’ll spend half my time in space and half my time on a farm looking after horses, perfectly reasonable.

Then you grow up a bit and suddenly the things you want most of all are the things you doubt the most. Your closest held dreams and desires are the ones most poisoned by doubt and fear, because they mean so damn much to you – how could you possibly measure up to them?

Stupid grown up brain and it’s stupid self-sabotaging ideas.

Anyway. My dream back then was to complete a Priestess Training, the only formal Priestess Training in the world I knew about, in Glastonbury Avalon. I honestly thought I would ever be brave enough to summon up the courage to apply – because to apply was to say to the universe, YES. I claim this. This is who I am. This is who I want to be.

And that was a huge deal. Who was I to claim it? What would people think?

In an unprecedented surge of outrageous courage, I applied and started the course and became a Sister of Avalon.

Doing the training, I finally felt like my dream was in reach and, strangely, I got the feeling of possibly: like this was something I actually could be. Like this was something that came so so naturally to me. Like this was something I had been training to be my whole life without me realising it. As if everything I had done up to this point – the events organising, the public speaking, the art school bit, the performance training, the dance education – I had really been a training to be a priestess all along.

It blew my tiny mind.

And even though I didn’t complete the further courses, my own personalised priestess training came thick and fast from the universe.

See, I think that once you started on the journey to walk the priestess path, and declare that desire to the universe – once you have categorically decided that’s what you are gonna do, the Goddess gives you the exact lessons you need no matter what…

… and, fair warning, and they probably won’t be what you expected them to be!

I expected to happily stay in that priestess training format and tradition forever more and that was that.

Goddess, however, had other ideas.

She took me on a profound journey of listening to my anger and expressing my truth – of challenging me to really get to know my feelings and take myself seriously. I had a LOT of shadow confronting to do, as I had spent a lot of my life as a Good Girl who didn’t let herself feel or express things that might bother or upset other people (and, real talk here, that shadow work was haaaaaard and painful and sucky but it had to be done).

Goddess challenged me to stand up in the world and be counted as Hers, to be braver than I ever have been before. She taught me how to really listen to my own inspiration, my own gnosis, my own heart.

She guided me to nourishing teachers and courses that took me deeper and deeper into what it meant to be a Priestess.

I remember being really explicitly encouraged by my guiding goddess Morgan to look deeper into the things that really really spoke to me – into mermaids and magic and devotion and dance and Avalon – and to be bold and share my love of Goddess and mermaids with the world through Rockstar Priestess.

She took me on a long, slow journey (I am a stubborn student!) of guiding my Spiritual Life and my Work Life towards sacred marriage. (I mean, it’s still a marriage in progress. They are in premarital counselling while they try to get on the same page. But you get the idea.)

And all the while, I knew I was meant to be Her Priestess. Sometimes I doubted it – sometimes (ha! Often!) I thought, who am I to claim this? Surely there are better people for this job than me in the world!

But I mostly trusted that if this is what I felt so strongly I had to do, then there must be a reason. There must be something I can do that She needs, that brings something needed to this world, otherwise I wouldn’t have this calling.

priestess path Godward CampaspeEvery now and again, when I feel full of doubt and thinking, why didn’t I want to do something simple with my life like be an accountant instead of this massive ridonkulous difficult spiritual epic effort, I remember that the Goddess needs all different kinds of Priestesses working for her in the world. She needs Priestesses with the balls (or should I say ovaries!) to organise retreats and events for women to connect in with Her. She needs Priestesses who are working to help women unleash their confidence and sexuality in dance class. She needs Priestesses who can write sacred songs in Her name, Priestesses who help heal the suffering of the world through charity work or being doctors, and Priestesses who champion animal rights.

She needs Priestesses who know how to work with herbs, Priestesses who uplift those around them, Priestesses who bring beauty into the world, Priestesses who love fiercely and care deeply about the people in their lives.

I think two things I keep relearning over and over again in my Priestess Training journey so far is:

 – You are never done training to be a priestess. There is always more to learn, more to embody, deeper to go. It’s not like you are initiated, and that it it. Nope. You are initiated, then the real work begins – you are challenged to step up and be bigger than you ever have before.

 – There is never only one way to be a Priestess, because being a Priestess is all about opening up to who you are on the fullest, most authentic, most real level. It’s all about coming home to yourself and to Divinity at the same time, because they are kind of the same thing. Goddess Spirituality is awesome like that.

I think if you have felt the calling to walk the Priestess Path, you know. You KNOW somewhere deep down – sometimes it’s so deep down you have buried with with fear and anxiety to try and keep you from touching it and stirring it.

When you hear the world Priestess, when you read about Priestesses, when you watch the Mists of Avalon or the Red Tent, something inside of you tries to leap towards it in excitement. It’s like you have an inner compass that always brings you back to this archetype of Priestess, no matter what other course you try to set it on – it’s like your antennae are just programmed to respond to priestessy things. You can travel around and try other stuff, but you are always drawn back to this true north. It’s a constant passion, a consistent interest, a desire you never grow out of.

I mean, it doesn’t mean you know how to get there. Or even that you feel like you are the kind of person who should go on that journey, (“Who, me?”) but you know it’s the direction you want to go, and no matter how much you try to talk yourself out of it, the compass still points north.

To the Goddess.

To the Divine Feminine.

To sovereignty, strength, inner knowing, deep connection with All That Is, and to serving women around the world.

Have you felt the calling of the Priestess Path?

9 thoughts on “The Call of the Priestess Path”

  1. When I was 10 years old, I found a book called “handbook for witches” and I knew in that very moment I wanted to become a WITCH as I grew up.
    And I have been on that path ever since…
    Then years later, I came across a book called “mists of Avalon” and I could feel the same feeling again – that I wanted to be a Priestess. It felt like coming home, reading this book!

    Then I became confused. I have never wanted to be a part of a coven or to lead women in a circle.
    And now that I´m taking my first “baby steps” into my crone age….I have a feeling that I AM HER already.
    So I guess it´s possible to be a Witchy Priestess or a Priestess witch. I think for me, the most important thing is how it FEELS deep inside of my heart and womb.
    No titles are needed.
    But SHE definately know how to call out for her daughters to join her again.
    So glad to be onboard.
    And so happy I found you =) and I am looking forward to see where this road will take me.
    To High Adventures!
    Spring greetings from Stockholm, Sweden

    1. Hey Charlotte! You know, the more I delve into the priestess stuff, the more I feel that witchiness is a real part of it. So much about being a witch is about recognising your own power, knowing what you want and deciding to go after it – and really I personally feel that is a core part of being a Priestess, understanding yourself and your desires and having the courage to go after it, to feel your power, to embrace that you are the creatrix of your reality. I feel that a lot of it is about learning who you are and letting yourself unfold like a rose, to see what beautiful colours and petals the goddess put there. The spell crafting is an extension of desire to me, which is an important part of Goddess Spirituality – opening up to your desire, and letting yourself desire things. Women have been denied their desire so long! We have to learn to embrace it, understand it, be intimate with it – to learn the lessons that come with receiving our desires so we can evolve into something new, rather than stay stuck in a place of frustration and longing.

      Maybe it’s the Aries in me, I was never very good at being passive and surrendering (despite being excellent at receiving presents :D) – I just gotta make it happen!

      What is a witch other than a woman who knows her own mystical, spiritual power and won’t let anyone take it away from her?

      Anyway, lovely to meet you Charlotte! xxx

  2. Suzanne/Inanna LeFay

    You have no idea how much I needed this today (and neither did I, until I read it with tears in my eyes)! You absolutely NAILED the way it feels to know that one is called to the Priestess path. I loved the part about chiding yourself for not wanting to be an accountant or something simple…and the need for a “sacred marriage” between your spiritual life and your work life. I keep trying to convince myself I can be happy without that…and it ain’t working. Then I remind myself that I’m already doing it, and am almost there…it may not always look like a scene out of “Mists”, but I strive every day to bring Avalon into everything I do. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

    1. <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 Suzanne! Gosh I am so glad what I wrote helped you! I was really nervous about sharing it because part of me felt like, if I was a PROPER whatever, I wouldn't feel any doubt - and I forget that what I have learnt from talking to my heroes at the top of their game in all sorts of different fields is that they STILL have doubt and have the internal struggle to follow their path - it's not like there is magically a level you get to where you are this perfect person. So touched by your comment. xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

    1. <3 sending you tons of love, this whole "find your soul's calling" thing is way trickier than people make it sound isn't it :D

  3. Echoing the comments above, I really needed this! How perfect is your timing girl!?

    I have faced the hard truth that I seek the approval of others way too much. I sought training not only to learn but to have a formal acknowledgment – permission to call myself a Priestess. I was frustrated when these courses weren’t quite giving me what I was seeking, but then I realised that what I was seeking was the power and self confidence to claim myself ‘Priestess’, without the yearning NEED for others to approve of it.
    So I have chosen to remove myself from the environment that seems to really encourage the importance of formal training and certificates, and try to find my own way. I am going to try to be brave and self initiate and claim to myself that it is enough – that it really is between me and Her, and no one else.

    That is really hard for me but I’ve learnt it is essential to me finding my true Priestess power. Ultimately if I complete these courses and am formally acknowledged I don’t think it will actually be as powerful as if I can claim it totally be myself.

    Big deep breath….

    Thank you <3

    1. Hey Olivia – this feels so familiar! There is still a big part of me that still craves “permission” and a formal acknowledgement, but when it came down to it, I was thinking – “would completing this make me feel like a Priestess? Would I feel like the “permission” through this course meant anything?” And I realised, no it wouldn’t – I could chase all the formal qualifications in the world but if I never claimed MYSELF as Priestess, from my heart, if I never stopped to listen to Her and do what SHE needed me to do as Priestess, then no matter how many qualifications I had I would STILL feel the same way – like I wasn’t enough, because looking outside is food for being not enough, you know?

      I think our purpose as priestess kind of has to unfold as well, and you need a LOT of alone time with yourself and goddess to find out where your compass is pulling – I think it might be easier (but scarier!) to do that outside a formal training, because then we don’t have a way-we-should-be hanging over us, a model of priestessness to fulfil.

      That said, I am excited to start doing formal priestess trainings later this year – finally, not because I feel like a need the acknowledgment (though that beastie does rear up from time to time) but because I think it would be FUN and I might pick up some useful stuff as I have some fun. Seriously, it’s taken me like ALL OF MY TWENTIES to get to this place, all of my twenties 😛

      Go forth brave warrior!!! xxxx

  4. Demi! Yes, to true north! The timing of this IS great, to not doubt ones own secret sauce and true longing. We still need to do our interview! This would be so great to talk about!!!

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